one DAPSILOG please!!!

in the midst of enjoying lemar's song, what about love im fascinated how the thoughts are put into lyrics. in addition to that, the rhythm is flavorful but not that sentimental. not mellow enough for broken hearted ppl to cry over.

you can check out on the lower right of this page about the lyrics of this song. thanks to sesh for the mp3 upload.

moving on, its friday weekend is approaching but im still restless and my work is about to start. but as usual, diko feel mag work, maybe later. so as i surf from the internet, i saw deanimator game found in ebaumsworld site. for bored ppl like me, i guess this can fill up my time till my shift finishes.

its almost past 3pm, when i went home yesterday. aside from spending my time to other stuff, i would love to come home and just sleep, not think about anything. i wish i cud do that...even for the next days. these past few days, i have realized so many things, here are just a few:

- the people we love are the same people who can truly hurt us, that will hit us badly.

- dont ignore the small stuff. big arguments start from it.

- we can never turn back time. we can just be hopeful.

- anger will not cause any good to any relationships. it blinded us to see the essential ones.

- during hardships, u can count on few good friends. thank goodness we have them.

- life does not end where you think it is. but it has began the moment u realize it.

- value the things u have, ull be needing them in the future.

- love, hurt, learn, apply. its a never ending process, dont stop at one stage.

i came across this internet poll in which most bloggers would be interested to answer. here it goes:

do you agree that internet bloggers, in their private exercise of free expression, should not be subject to libel laws?

libel is the tort or delict of publishing a false statement that negatively affects someone's reputation. libel is defamation that can be seen, such as in published writing, printing, effigy, a movie, or a statue. on the other hand slander is any defamation that is spoken and heard. im just wondrin what will be the ground for filing a case against a blogger who simply express what he/she feels about something or somebody. would the basis for the accusation is from the perspective of the person who is being offended? theres a thin line that separates personal expression to a statement. how can you consider a statement as false? what things are being protected by libel laws? what if the blogger's expression is misconstrued? what is the countercharge file for libel?

too many questions, got few answers. all i know is...this will defeat the vehemence of spontaneity and liberalism.

monday. lots of stuff to do, however i submitted the report already, ohh yeah this early. so last week, we found out things that made me a little surprised. one of which is finding someone to replace my colleague who will be doing another job now. right, we are asked to look for someone who we would like to work with and vice versa. it will be a voluntary application for the position that we offered. but till now, we have no listings of who the candidates will be. i dont know if its part of our job or its already my leader's task to provide the schedule of the interview...

so here now lies a question, who are we gonna choose? after all the controversies, we have people here whom we wanted to at least apply for the position as we see potentials from them. oh yeah we do recognize their promising skills. im not too sure if its very filipino that when i try to approach them like getting feedback if they are interested with the promotion, they responded in a timid tone as if wondring why i wanted them to apply. well of course, do i have to tell it straight to their faces "guys ure good, so try it."...of course if ill be finding someone to work with, definitely its someone who knows what he/she is doing and can get the job done. aside from being an interesting person, he/she must be interested with what were actually doing. interested, hmm for how long? hehe guess thats another matter.

part of this so called "promotion" will be some interested candidates, whom for whatever reason are so eager to grab this opportunity. in which along the way, become a pain in our necks. and as we would like to put away partiality, i would like to give questions during interview that would crack their brains once in a while.

another thing is who would decide to choose the right candidate? alright we have inputs to whom we could possibly want to be "the one" however we still have our immediate supervisors that could interfere with it. i just hope that "palakasan" will never be an issue here. that thing will outmaneuver the purpose of conducting the interviews, i mean you know, u might as well appoint someone in the position if that will the case. however, as they say history repeats itself. i hope not, else were all gonna be dead.

so what kung malake ang tyan ko? sino rin ang nagbigay sayo ng karapatang titigan to? feelin mo buntis ako? sa tingen mo di ako nagcombantrin? or akala mo siguro napadaan ako sa kainan gantong fiesta ha?

anak naman kase ng pitomput-pitong tupa, kung baket naman napaka obvious na medyo lumalake nga ang tyan ko...kung itatanong mo anong dahilan, malay ko at pake ko. opo hindi ako ganun ka beauty conscious na tila nagkakandatae kapag may pumansing, "hey tumataba ka ata" sabay tingen sa tyan. hindi ko kinasanyang gumamit ng tape measure pra mya maya manukat kung nabawasan or nadagdagan ba ang akeng weyst line. in other words, hinde ako body conscious.

walang masama if nafafascinate kayo sa tyan ko dahil abahh pambihira kita mo nga naman ang lake ng tyan ni miss pero hinde buntis. ok lang sana kung sa sarili mo lang sinasabe ang masama nito, chinichismis mo pa dun sa kasama mong gelpren na mukhang anorexic!!!

kung tutuusin, wala akong pake how it happened, why it happened and when it happened. siguro dahil may juan dela cruz akong syndrome, tipong pagkakain ang sarap mag siesta, zzz. or msarap sumalampak sa sofa habang nagfiflip ng channels, habang nagtetext or habang nagbbite ka ng kuko. pero gayunpaman, wala ka pa rin pakelam kung ano man ang madagdag saken. hindi naman hinaharangan ng tyan ko ang buong kalsada para maging dahilan at titigan mo to. isa pa, meron ka namang tyan na pwede mong titigan. kung tatanungin mo saken kung nakainom na ko ng yakult, halos maging kalasa na ng laway ko yan dahil palainom talaga ako nyan.

kung tutuusin marameng pwedeng maging magandang resulta ang pagkakaron nito. una, instant patungan ng braso habang nakahalukipkip ka, pwede ring maging unan ng boylet mo, pwede mong himas himasin at sabihing "boss masama ang tyan ko, uwi na ho ako," pwede ring pang cushioning pag siksikan sa concert, may magmamana na rin sa pantalon ng nanay mo at marami pang iba. kaya hindi rin masama if medyo nagkakatyan ka na...dahil maaring senyales din ito na nagkakaedad ka na.

siguro ung ibang tulad ko, maraming ginagawang activities, andyan ung involve themselves to sports, to badminton, to swimming oh basta un sports na nga eh. andyan din ung sawtbits dayet at kung ano ano pa. siguro nagpadala sila sa mga komento at tingen ng kung sino sino kaya ayun gusto nilang lumiit ang tyan nila.

ahh basta ako, ill still eat ung tama lang saken, lumake man to or lumiit, isang hamak na butete pa rin ako. i dont follow the pa sexy trend. i set my own trend.

panahon na naman ng pag gastos, kung mapapansin nyong nag uulan lately at napaparami kayo ng kaen, walang masama dyan ganyan talaga dahil ppasok na ang tag ulan. ang sarapp matulog. idagdag mo na rin dyan ang mga palabas na gustong panoorin sa mall, sinunod sunod kase nila ang pagshoshowing ng magagndang palabas.

hindi ko maalala if may bata akong naringgan na ang sabe nya ay da vincent code. heheh pauso diba, pero malamang alam nyo na kung baket napapanahon tong pag usapan. marami kase ang magrereact gayong ipapalabas na ung movie. kung ano anong katarantaduhan na rin ang napapabalita that added excitement to watch the movie. meron pa nga daw grupo na nagprotest para itigil ang pagpapalabas nito. gumanti si mtrcb chairman at ginawang R-18 ang movie. ibig sabihin lahat ng taong ang edad ay disiotso pataas maari ng manood, ke saradong katoliko ka man or hinde, ke matured ka man or hinde, ke lalake or babae or myembro ng third sex or ke may ka date or wala, welcome na welcome ka sa moviehouse.

henewey, isang quote na mula sa librong sinulat ni bob ong ang ABNKKBSNPLAko?!

Sabi nila, sa kahit ano raw problema, isang tao lang

ang makakatulong sa 'yo - ang sarili mo. Tama sila.

hindi ko to patutumanggihan pa, dahil sa totoo lang me, myself and i nga ang drama ko sa buhay. hinde dahil gusto kong magsarili kundi sa bawat pagsubok alam kong wla namn talagang akong ibang tatakbuhan kundi ang sarili ko muna. maliban na lang kung pera ang problema, sa mga bumbay siguro ako lalapit.

siryusli ispiking gaano man kabigat ang yong provlemah, problem sa bf-gf, sa hiwa-hiwalay mong pamilya, sa bulok mong trabaho, sa pagpapaganda ng iyong boobs, sa twisyon mong pagkamahal mahal at the end of the day, maiiwan ka sa kwartong nag iisa, nag mumuni-muni, nagsasarili. ay teka maling word ata un. sige, solemnly thinking about stuff na hindi mo kinatulugan, pinaglipasan mo ng gutom...ikaw at ikaw pa rin ang makakatulong sa sarili mo. pero baket nga ba? dahil kailangan mo munang ihanda ang sarili mo, imotivate mo at sabihin gago ka kaya mo yan. lahat ng ito ay di mo talaga mahihingi sa ibang tao. oo ngat may nasasabihan ka ng mga sama ng loob, maaayang mag inom, makikinig sa walang katapusan mong pag aatungal dahil iniwan ka ng boyprend mo hardinero, and ending sayo pa rin ung problema mo. tests were given para kayanin, so we can process it carefully, marealize mo san ang sobra...san ang kulang...pwede pa ba...or baka hinde na.

nakakainis talaga si bob ong. sapul kung humirit.

monday. walang tulog, este walang planong matulog dahil may pupuntahan. manonood ng movie, at may usapang magkita-kita ng alas 3 ng hapon. magbyabyahe sa pagkainit init na panhon, napapakunot ang noo, pero walang magawa. sa haba ng byahe nakaidlip, hanggang makababa sa mall at nasabik sa aircon. yeah, ganyan na nga kainit ang panahon.

nasa labas ng movie house. tinitingnan ang movie slot. ang daming napapansin. may mag partner na pinagtawanan ko, sa isip ko lang naman. eh pano kase halatang bagong mag dyowa eh. nagpapacute pa sa isat isa. nahihiya sila, bawat kilos nila sadyang maingat. tapos itutuon ko ang paningen ko sa may popcorn para madistract ako. after 30 minutes, dumating na sila. bumili ng tiket, pasok na sa loob. tamang tama pasimula na ng movie. silent hill, matagal na nameng pinakaaabangang panoorin, para kaseng maganda.

maganda naman ung movie, tipong u dont know what will happen at un ang inenjoy ko sa lahat. may mga nakakatuwan eksena at kung paanong may makailang beses nilang nabbangga ang basurahan hehe. kung hanap nyo ay kakaibang trip, maganda tong panoorin.

past 6pm. gutom na ang lahat, nag decide kumaen sa dencios. umorder ng sisig, gambas and chicken. nag enjoy sa tawanan. nagkaron din ng silent moment when something came up. clash of mood lang pero di naman naging violent. ako? tahimik lang, nakikiramdam. nag-iisip, nagpilit ngumite. ung ngiteng hindi plastik.

sinubukan nameng mag ikot ikot. kaso dumiretso na ng office para lang sa aircon. nagkwentuhan sa lobby. sari-sari natuklasan, ang kwento ko? hindi ko pa rin kinumpleto. tulad nga ng poster ng silent hill, tikom ang bibig ko, siguro pagod akong mag explain.

nakasakay sa fx. nakatingen sa bintana. papuntang opis khit linggo. titingen sa bag dahil magbabayad na.

daps: mama bayad ho. sa may train station (mag aabot ng P50)

NOTE: P30 ang pamasahe magmula sa amen.

driver: san galing to?

daps: sa bayan po.

driver: ilan to?

daps: ho? (nagtataka) kasya ho ba dyan ang dalawa?

silence. deadma si manong driver.

LESSON: dont ask the obvious stuff.

hinde simple ang lahat para saken. alam kong ganun din sayo. we both not want to be here. but i guess were driven to be here. nakakalungkot no, parang nabura na lahat. i would like to think that im still the same. i would like to see na ure still the old person ive known, this time much stronger, loving and kakayanin mo lahat. u take care in whatever u do. siguro parehas naten kelangan ng rest, all these are too much for both of us. ill miss everything about u. & ure right, what we have was never a waste. u will be remembered as the sweetest person in my life. i wish u have a good life as well. makakaya rin naten to.

---a-n-o-n-y-m-o-u-s---

kung ano ano na naman ang pumapasok sa ulo ko, kung ano anong litanya ang gusto kong sabihin. gusto kong maniwala na ok ako. kaso hinde, gusto kong maniwala na kaya kong ibalik ang mga bagay na nasabe ko, kaso hinde ganun ka simple. at higit sa lahat ayoko sa sitwasyong kelangan kong ibigay ang sarili ko para maabot ka lang. isa lang ang kelangan ko...isang masarap na burger champ.

kung pwede lang uminom ng gamot na makakatulog ako sa loob ng isang linggo tapos pag nagising ako makakalimutan ko na ung nangyari. teka di naman kaya may pagka suicidal yan, pero wla sa image ko. kung pwede ko lang sabihin ang salitang "sige lang." na may ngiti. at higit sa lahat kung pwede lang talagang maayos ang kalsada na malapit sa lugar namen dahil nagkakanda kalyo ang pwet namen kapag nadadaan ang tricycle dun.

oh kitams, wala naman tlagang direksyon ang entry na to, dahil sa una pa lang wala sa sarili ang sumulat. magulo ang pananaw, malikot ang kamalayan ng isip, hindi maisawata ang damdamin. pero ang sakit ng tyan, kubeta lang ang katapat.

nakakatawa pero sa paglilinis ko ng mga links sa aking favorite folder, meron akong nakita. before, i used to join religious forums, not cuz i count myself as one. but like anyone else, i also have questions in mind, and yes hindi po ako saradong katoliko. up to now im still asking questions and i never stop seeking for the answers.

nakita ko tuloy tong links na to. actually i never imagine that i cud answer that way dun sa mga taong masasabeng nabasbasan daw when it comes to christian teachings nor i never thought that i have that knowledge pagdating sa bible. hindi ko rin sure if talgang di lang talaga ako madaling maniwala sa mga sabe sabe.

napadpad ako sa forum na yan, cuz i think im striken by the way ppl answer sa mga newbies. at the same time i wanna challenge them if they really know something. ayoko kase ng bolahan.

if mababasa nyo ung links na yan, i use the name i_h8_ja_fakes, for very obvious reasons. as we are all aware, may mga taong ang gagaling mangabisa ng bible, pala simba every sunday, at mga di makabasag pinggan kuno, but all are fraud. at yun ang ayoko. hehe di na rin ako magtataka pa kung baket tinigil ko na rin ang pakikipag kulitan ko sa mga kadiskusyon ko dun sa forum. nagsawa na rin akong kausapin sila dahil siguro i dont find it entertaining anymore, nor i find it useful to me. ang ending, wala akong natutunan sa knila.

it is now that i realize na meron palang purpose why we keep things from the past, tulad ng mga links na to. something to look back, something to ponder. something to laugh about.